If you have been following along with my blogs over the years you will see every so often I will get focused on health/weight for a post or two...well it must be that time again...hey at least I haven't given up completely right...I am more concerned with health but lets just say I would love to be thinner...not tiny not skinny but thinner I think that is OK to admit.
Usually I am trying to rewind all the bad habits just in time to get back into a swim suit for a family vacation...cram desperate weight loss...I hate the thought of wearing a swimsuit...I know I'm not alone!
I don't think I have ever admitted this before but when I have birth to my daughter 16.5 yrs ago I was 217lbs...I gained 79 lbs while pregnant...when I think back I just followed the directions given to me, eat when you're hungry...I ate but not tons, I definately gave into cravings without a second guess but up until then I had never had a weight issue...now since then it has always been a struggle.
I have to admit I am kind of uncomfortable admitting this....deep breath. See I'm 5'3".... so at that weight I was unrecognizable...I only have a couple of photos of that time and I have considered destroying them...now I had just given birth and I did have insane amounts of ademia and after about 2 weeks I lost 30-40 lbs of water weight and a whopping 6lbs of baby.
Over the first year of my daughters life I just embraced motherhood and honestly I didn't worry to much about my weight but after she was 15 months and we had just moved into our first house I made a lot of changes and lost about 103 lbs...I got everything under controll then I got pregnant again...it wasn't in the plans at the time. I actually had wanted to enjoy being thin and fit again, but of course I was thrilled to be pregnant and I'm glad to say I did not gain that much weight during my second pregnancy, probably more than many but not by any means a small amount.
I have struggled with my weight on and off over my adult life...most of which I can directly trace back to a life event, moving, trauma, loss, stress, moving again...I guess we can safely say I am a stress eater...you know when people say I'm too stressed/upset to eat, yeah that's not me...
This wasn't going to be a confession post, I'm not even sure if I will publish it...if you are reading this then I decided to put it out there...I know I'm not alone.
I wish I had it all under controll but I would never stoop to unhealthy actions just to be thin, so it has been a roller coaster of being thin and not so thin...you know what I really don't like is how I let it affect the things I do, where I go, and how I feel about myself at times...do the people who judge you not know you are always there judging yourself already...one thing that makes me crazy is when people who struggle with weight judge others for their weight struggles..it's not OK.
Sometimes I am amazed that people who have their weight under controll at all times think people with extra weight don't have the knowledge or don't eat well or don't like healthy food...I like good food, healthy food but I also like junk food and sweets...I just need to work on balance...I have decided to get back to what helped me lose all those pounds back after I had my kids.
For me that is low carb...but I kind of coupled my plan with food combining which is eating certain things with other types of food and not mixing certain food with others. Confusing? Honestly I can't go into the details here but if you want to know more you can find it all in a book called Fit for Life.
This took some getting used to because I was so used to starting my day with an egg on an english muffin.
I have been loving that on instagram so many people I follow are doing paleo and or low carb, it's really cool to see what others are eating, there's power in numbers.
project health/low carb board on Pinterest.
Another meal I miss and I go for on the weekend sometimes is eggs cheese and bread and of course bacon...I can eat all of these on my plan but not together in this combo.
In conclusion I feel good. I had been suffering with a lot of reflux and that has completely diappeared and did right away...as for the weight I didn't weigh myself, I know how I felt and how things fit before I started this journey...and I will see very clearly how I am progressing in my clothes, I'm not going to let myself get caught up on numbers.
I am on week 4 and I can see positive changes besides feeling better and being less hungry.
There is no deadline, no trip to get in shape for...I just want to be healthy and happy.
I am not saying anyone should eat the way I am nor am I asking for help to do things in another way because at a certain age we all know what works and what doesn't work, right.
A few months back I found a lump in my breast and I went right in to have it checked out, there are so many people my age who are dealing with breast cancer so I never for a second thought about ignoring it. I had a mammogram on both sides and ultrasound, honestly I was some what scared of a mammogram after a life time of hearing they hurt...well they don't, it's a little uncomfortable but nothing at all to worry about. I was told they didn't find anything by the Dr and I left so relieved.
Until the following day when I was called back in because they saw something on the other breast, they wanted to take a look. Terrifying.
Well they found an enlarged lymph node in my right breast...they said they wanted to watch it and follow up in 6 months I am to return for more testing...I will admit I don't like the idea of waiting at all. Here's the thing though I know exactly where it is and I can not find it or sense anything at all.
I am hoping they are going to find that the lymph node is no longer enlarged...
So you can see I have a lot of great motivation to get my health in order...
I'm not sharing this for any other reason then to hopefully encourage someone who has been putting off a mammogram or self exam, or Dr appt....to go, don't be scared.
One thing that is very comforting to me is that I went in, I didn't wait becuase women here in Canada don't get typically get a mammogram until the age of 50 so I was able to get testing done 9 years early...now I will wait (patienly) and I will get in to have this checked as as soon as they will allow, I have my fingers crossed that it will be nothing to worry about but we all know some of us will have this cross to bare and finding things early and taking action is definately the way to approach these challenges.
Thanks for letting me share my very personal stuff....we'll be back to all things home and DIY very shortly...this was not a sponsored post in any way all the opinions are my own and I am just sharing things that I think, love or that I am using that work for me.